When Jesus came back

It was never like this before Jesus came back. It used to be you could bash gays, or complain about welfare mothers, or walk past homeless people without so much as looking down at them. But since Jesus came back, no more of that, no sir.

It wouldn't have been so bad if He'd just come back to judge us all. I mean, isn't that the way it was supposed to happen? He'd come back, and He'd look to see whether you'd gone to church, and done a good job of raising your kids and stuff like that, then He'd send us off to our eternal reward or punishment, and that would be that. But no, He couldn't do that. He had to come back and make us do the things we were supposed to do. You know, like if you were supposed to be your brother's keeper, or if you were supposed to be merciful or something, He'd actually make you do it.

And remember how we used to make fun of all them punk hippie kids with their long hair and all? You could call 'em faggots, or ask 'em if they were girls or anything like that. Well, you can't do that anymore, not since Jesus came back. You'd think He'd wear a suit and tie or something, and get a haircut, like a decent human being, but no, there He is, just like in the pictures, with that long hair, and that beard, and half the time He's wearing them stupid sandals. Now how are we supposed to raise up our kids decent with that kind of example around?

And you just can't get away from him. Seems like everywhere you go, there's Jesus, telling you how you gotta live and what you're supposed to be doing. I suppose next thing you know he'll pop up and tell me not to spit on the sidewalk no more or something. He's even on TV. No kidding, there's Jesus himself, right there on the TV for Chri- well, you know what I mean. Sure, we've always had religion on TV, but at least you could get some entertainment out of them TV preachers, all asking for money and pretending to heal somebody. But this is different – Jesus gets on the TV, telling everybody what they gotta do and how they gotta live. I even seen him break in on the news show, talking about what the world leaders were doing wrong, and telling 'em what they gotta do different.

I'm telling you, things just ain't the same since Jesus came back.

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The above is just a piece of idle speculation I engaged in one day: What if Jesus decided to do things differently than we're expecting? What if He came back to live with us again? What if He was there to give us guidance and correction, perhaps sometimes in a gentle, shepherd-leading-his-flock manner, and perhaps sometimes in a more overturning-tables, throwing-the-money-changers-out-of-the-temple manner? What if Jesus could pop up in front of you at any minute, to comment on what you're doing? Think about it.